Searching for Jillian

Well, my eating has been terrible. I've pulled a muscle in my leg and therefore had to take some time off from running. My stepdaughter's birthday party is tonight and that means cake. Easter is Sunday and that means pie. MY birthday is next week and that means more cake. The kids at school have been CRAZY lately - there were another three fights yesterday in what almost resembled a riot in the cafeteria (we really should be paid extra for putting our lives on the lines!). Plus we are desperately trying to get our students prepared for the state tests next week, and more than half of my students failed last year (did I mention I teach special education? how unfair is it that I have a student that is at a third grade reading level and he's expected to take the same test as all the other eighth graders??? don't even get me started). All that combined with the stresses around here lately and it's a wonder how I'm not bald from ripping my hair out yet.

I really need to get my attitude back in check. I know all this is me. The overeating - me. The bad attitude at school - me. The lack of motivation - me. The overall crankiness - me. I even got a note from one of my students today that said she didn't appreciate my attitude towards her and that she's sorry for having an attitude back. How mature! I was impressed and upset at the same time. I feel so bad for having such a bad attitude towards her and she really had the right to be defensive! Oh boy, maybe they need to up my meds. WOW, I'm so not someone to be like this! I really need to check myself at the door - give my whole aura a once over before I even leave my house in the morning!!!

I don't know. This too shall pass, right? (wait, don't answer that)

ANYWAYS, I've been inspired by the many positive feedback I've heard about Jillian Michaels' workout videos. So, I've decided to invest in one or two. I'll have to head out to Walmart and see what they have. I really need to get into strength training. Cardio comes so easy for me because of my thunder thighs and how strong my legs are, but my upper body is WEAK and my abs are in need to some massive toning. Plus, with not being able to do my thirty minutes on the treadmill in the morning, I really need to supplement that with some kind of workout. Not to mention, if I have a video or two at home, I'll have no excuse not to workout when I can't make it to the Y. Maybe I'll go out there after my stepdaughter's birthday party this evening.

Speaking of which, we are having her party here at the campground. And her mother and her mother's family are joining us. Oh boy. Don't get me wrong, I have a tremendous amount of respect for her mother. She's a WONDERFUL mom and has raised both of my stepdaughters into amazing girls/women. But, it's always a little awkward being around her. We've definitely had our moments. It took her quite a while to get it into her head that she just wasn't a part of my hubby's family anymore. But, last night at the calling hours, she did a really good job of not overstepping her boundaries, and I appreciate her efforts. Plus, she's a very kind-hearted Christian woman, and that in itself is something to be respected. We'll just forget the little bit of shit she's pulled in the past and the fact that she lived on my husband's $1000 a month child support/alimony up until recently when she FINALLY decided to get a real job (considering she'll be losing some of it now that Amby's turning 18). By-gones will be by-gones ;)

Well, happy hump day everyone! THANK GOD tomorrow is my Friday - we have a four day weekend for Easter! Woot woot!!