...until i look in the mirror... or at another woman... why does it seem that lately everyone is losing weight while i just get bigger and bigger... on saturday morning, while at boot camp class, i looked around and realized i was the biggest woman in there... i seriously wanted to scream COME ON, WHERE ARE MY FAT PEEPS THIS MORNING?!?!?! unreal :(
since it's warmer, i REALLY have no clothes to wear... all of my capris are too small for me... so i picked the best of the worst and came to work... fortunately, they seem to be getting looser as the day goes on, so i'm feeling a little better about how i look... but i did notice how much chubbier my face is looking... my weight gain is nearing 20 pounds now... i refuse to weigh myself anymore... it just depresses me even more!
anyways, i'm so jealous of my hubby... my otherwise wonderful man is a complete JERK... and you know why? he's lost over 40 pounds... while i should be so happy for him, i'm filled with anger... i really try not to show it... i try really hard to be supportive.. i mean, he's in ONEderland now! that's GREAT! and he doesn't even work out! yeah, not at all... nice huh? must be really freaking nice! ;)
ok enough whining... today is another new start... my goal for the week - limit snacks! only two, one right after school and one at night... and they have to be healthy choices... this is my version of weening myself off of my out-of-control binging! i hope it works! this past weekend was nothing but a huge binge fest... i mean, eating until my stomach hurt... so NO MORE! my sanity just can't take it... and i seriously am not going to weigh myself... i want to judge my weight based solely on how i feel and how my clothes fit... for instance, this morning, i really had a hard time painting my toenails... my stomach is really in the way... NO MORE! limit snacks... okay, i can do this!